You Sound Like a Woman

I was one of four girls working as a lift operator at a ski resort. The issue itself does not stem from working in a male-dominated environment. I am not one to believe that women are less likely to succeed in male-dominated fields, but I will not deny the challenges that come with it. I enjoyed working at this ski resort, and most of my co-workers were very respectful, but I am not oblivious.

“Quit complaining. You sound like a woman.”

This is something I heard quite often during my first days at Giant’s Ridge, but it was not originally directed at me. It was rarely even directed at the women who work at the resort. This was used by the older men I worked with, and it was intended to be an insult when someone had a complaint or talked too much. At the time I did not take offense to this. I didn’t think it was a bad thing to “sound like a woman,” and it wasn’t being used against me anyway. Eventually, I caught on, and this was the first lesson I learned. I knew I did not want to “sound like a woman.”

I stayed quiet at work. I did not complain or talk out of turn. If someone asked me a question I was careful not to ramble. I forcibly shaped myself into a silent and compliant worker in order to fit in. I kept quiet when my paycheck was a month late because I knew if I brought it up too often I’d be labeled a termagant. I stayed silent when I’d overhear my coworkers making rude remarks. I needed the job, and I knew I didn’t have much control.

“You’re too small to work on that lift. You aren’t strong enough.”

I am not a small girl. I am five-foot-eight, and I’ve got a lot of muscle. This was the second lesson I learned. I had to prove myself capable of handling bigger lifts, so I did. I stayed outside for most of my ten-hour-shifts while the other men I worked with talked amongst themselves in the shack. I came home exhausted and sore nearly everyday hoping I would be given a chance to work on the bigger lifts. I was never given that chance.

It was frustrating to see the new guys, who were much smaller than me, be given an opportunity to work on the bigger lifts the moment they were hired. I had already proven myself capable. I knew I was strong enough, and I put in significantly more effort than the majority of anyone else I worked with. When I did occasionally bring this up, I was given the same answer. “You’re too small.” “You wouldn’t be strong enough.”

“Just ignore them.”

Cat-calling was a serious issue at this resort. Not from the people I worked with, but from the customers. It was constant, and it was something every girl had to deal with at the resort. We were told that if someone was being disrespectful or misbehaving, we could deactivate their lift ticket, but this did not include cat-calling. Some of the guys I worked with found it funny, and they’d encourage absurd remarks and rude comments. This is the third lesson I learned. It was better to ignore them.

The majority of these remarks and comments came from middle school boys or teenagers. Every once in a while I’d hear them from older men. Ignoring them didn’t stop them, but it did stop my coworkers from encouraging them. At one point we were told we could talk to a specific lead about these remarks, but this lead was already a registered sex offender, and we knew he wouldn’t be any help.

“You’ve got a tight butt.”

One of the older guys we worked with said this to a girl fresh out of high school. He was over twice her age, and when he was fired after confessing his love for this girl, he threw a massive fit. His son also worked at the resort after being dishonorably discharged from the military for sexual assault. It took weeks of complaints for him to be fired.

In the break room, there were cutouts from Playboy magazines lined up neatly on the wall. There were also photos showing the difference between “male skiers/snowboarders” and “female skiers/snowboarders.” The men shown in these photos were doing tricks or jumps, while the women shown in these photos had either fallen down or were seriously injured. I am not sure where they got these photos, but I always worried that they were taking these photos at our own resort without permission.

It’s important to note that there were many men I worked with that did not tolerate this behavior, but they were in the same boat as us. They needed money, and they didn’t want to be labeled as sensitive and high-maintenance. I couldn’t blame them. Most of them had children or grandchildren, and they already had a lot on their hands. The fourth lesson I learned was the most important lesson. I am allowed to complain in situations of injustice, I do not have to prove myself to anyone, and I will not ignore unwarranted behavior. It is okay to sound like a woman.