2 Where can I find a list of the Developmental Affirmations?

Here is the entire list of the Developmental Affirmations grouped by developmental stages.

Click here to download a handout of the Developmental Affirmations.


Becoming, prenatal stage (peach)
  • I celebrate that you are alive.
  • Your needs and safety are important to me.
  • We are connected and you are whole.
  • You can make healthy decisions about your experiences.
  • You can be born when you are ready.
  • Your life is your own.

♥  I love you just as you are.


Being, Stage 1, 0 to 6 months (red)
  • I’m glad you are alive.
  • You belong here.
  • What you need is important to me.
  • I’m glad you are you.
  • You can grow at your own pace.
  • You can feel all of your feelings.

♥  I love you and I care for you willingly.


Doing, Stage 2, 6 to 18 months (orange)
  • You can explore and experiment and I will support and protect you.
  • You can use all of your senses when you explore.
  • You can do things as many times as you need to.
  • You can know what you know.
  • You can be interested in everything.
  • I like to watch you initiate and grow and learn.

♥  I love you when you are active and when you are quiet.


Thinking, Stage 3, 18 months to 3 years (yellow)
  • I’m glad you are starting to think for yourself.
  • It’s okay for you to be angry and I won’t let you hurt yourself or others.
  • You can say no and push and test limits as much as you need to.
  • You can learn to think for yourself and I will think for myself.
  • You can think and feel at the same time.
  • You can know what you need and ask for help.

♥  You can become separate from me and I will continue to love you.


Identify and Power, Stage 4, 3 to 6 years (green)
  • You can explore who you are and find out who other people are.
  • You can be powerful and ask for help at the same time.
  • You can try out different roles and ways of being powerful.
  • You can find out the results of your behavior.
  • All of your feelings are okay with me.
  • You can learn what is pretend and what is real.

♥  I love who you are.


Structure, Stage 5, 6 to 12 years (light blue)
  • You can think before you say yes or no and learn from your mistakes.
  • You can trust your intuition to help you decide what to do.
  • You can find a way of doing things that works for you.
  • You can learn the rules that help you live with others.
  • You can learn when and how to disagree.
  • You can think for yourself and get help instead of staying in distress.

♥  I love you even when we differ; I love growing with you.


Identity, Sexuality and Separation, Stage 6, adolescence (dark blue)
  • You can know who you are and learn and practice skills for independence.
  • You can learn the difference between sex and nurturing, and be responsible for your needs and behavior.
  • You can develop your own interests, relationships and causes.
  • You can learn to use old skills in new ways.
  • You can grow in your maleness and femaleness and still be dependent at times.
  • I look forward to knowing you as an adult.

♥  My love is always with you. I trust you to ask for my support.


Interdependence, Stage 7, adult years (violet/purple)
  • Your needs are important.
  • You can be uniquely yourself and honor the uniqueness of others.
  • You can be independent and interdependent.
  • Through the years you can expand your commitments to your own growth, to your family, your friends, your community and to all humankind.
  • You can build and examine your commitments to your values and causes, your roles and tasks.
  • You can be responsible for your contributions to each of your commitments.
  • You can be creative, competent, productive and joyful.
  • You can trust your inner wisdom.
  • You can say your hellos and goodbyes to people, roles, dreams and decisions.
  • You can finish each part of your journey and look forward to the next.
  • Your love matures and expands.

♥  You are lovable at every age.


Integration, preparing for death stage (white)
  • You can grow your whole life through.
  • You can look upon your journey through life’s stages as natural transitions.
  • You can integrate all of your life experiences and die when you are ready.
  • You can celebrate the gifts you have received and the gifts you have given.
  • You deserve the support that you need.
  • You can share your wisdom in your way.

♥  You are lovable just the way you are.


I like to watch you initiate and grow and learn.

Doing — Stage 2


DIGGING DEEPER: learn more about the stages.

The affirmations were developed in sets to respond to the tasks required of a person transitioning through each stage. Each set of affirmations is a special set of permissions to grow. If a particular set sounds especially important to you, you may be revisiting those tasks. Parents often revisit the tasks their children are learning.

There are nine sets of affirmations, with each set corresponding to a stage. However, because for many years the conventional wisdom recognized seven stages, we have left the stages numbered one through seven (birth through adulthood) as we are accustomed to seeing them. Since current brain research indicates that the prenatal months are, in fact, a very busy stage, we add the “Becoming” stage. Also, since great numbers of people are now living to be young-old, old, and old-old, we added the last stage, the “Integration” stage. That makes nine stages in all.


Words that Help: Affirmations for any age, every stage Copyright © by Jean Illsley Clarke, Ph.D. All Rights Reserved.


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